The other night, I had a conversation with my husband about a series of upcoming bills we need to pay (property taxes, etc). I discovered that after I paid all that was due on my side, I’d pretty much empty out what remains in my savings. Since I took 3 months off this year, paid for a small wedding/reception and took a slight pay cut, I find myself not quite on top of my finances and I really got worked up about it. I have this perfectionist streak in me (no I’m not always a zen/balanced yogini!) and when I feel like things get sloppy in areas of my life, I get very frustrated. My husband, ever the patient and kind man he is, talked it out with me for about an hour, then he went to bed. I still didn’t feel calm or resolution in my heart, so I spent the next half hour doing some yoga and pranayama.
Like an old friend welcoming me into its arms, the yoga helped me to remove the chatter in my mind and calm my nervous system. I know it is said that talking through your issues is a good thing, but sometimes there is just nothing more to say on it that will change reality … you need to stop analyzing and starting breathing/stretching. 🙂
At the end of the yoga session, I realized (yet again) that my restless, critical mind is what creates a painful existence for me. A truer way of existing: clearing your mind and heart and just appreciating your existence in this world at all, sitting quietly with your eyes closed and feeling the peaceful emptiness of just “being”. I turned off all that noise in my brain and reduced the situation to its base components: “I often need money, sometimes I have less than I’d like, sometimes that sucks”. That was really all there was to it and it didn’t need to define me or my life completely by how much money is in my bank account.
I found a wonderful and very well-written piece explaining the concept of yamas (universally ethical life rules to live by) and niyamas (rules governing individual conduct) and the idea of living a true life. As the author puts it:
“When attempting to live a life without falsehoods satya seems to be almost non-existent due to the many masks we wear when doing business, in our personal affairs, or even when existing among our own family members. The truth can be only found within an individual. To live a life with truth is to live to its ultimate peak. It may be easy for a person to believe or justify that they are living with integrity by coming to yoga classes, but it goes much further than the physical practice. A life lived with truth, when no one is watching, creates ripples of positive actions, which in return leads to positive karma, which in turn reduces mental and emotional stress.”
I thought it was an eloquent, complete and beautiful explanation of these concepts…and proof that being a kind and true person just attracts many more blessings in your life.